Category Archives: Spiritual Growth

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What I Learned From a 30 Day Facebook Break

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It’s no surprise that studies have proven and continue to prove that people who limit time on social media are happier.

At the beginning of January, I decided that I was allowing too many extra minutes to get sucked up on Facebook and the internet in general.

I decided that I would take at least one month away from Facebook with one caveat – I would show up once a week just to post my blog.

My husband moved our main home computer to our basement (which is very cold this time of year) and this forced me to only use the computer when I had a clear and direct goal to accomplish.

How has this impacted my life? I’m so glad you asked 🙂

1. More Time – This is the most simple and obvious way that abstaining from social media has impacted my life positively.

I think many of us have a form of media (t.v., movies, gaming, internet) that can suck us in and before we know it, one or two hours have gone by and we think, “Where has the time gone and what do I have to show for it?!”

Saying no to Facebook and extra online time has given me more time to accomplish other goals and interests, which has in turn decreased my stress and simply made me feel more peaceful.

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2. Greater Contentment and Confidence – When you aren’t constantly hearing what 700 other people think it is simply refreshing. To be confident in your convictions and decisions (without checking in to see how many people “liked and commented” on your most recent thought) can produce great joy and peace.

Most of us tend to present our “best face” online – so social media isn’t usually an accurate gauge of someone’s reality. When we see pictures of people’s perfectly behaved children or amazing vacation, we may find ourselves filled with discontent over our own lives rather than reminding ourselves that we are seeing someone’s highlights – not their day-to-day reality.

3. Greater Thought Space – Media has a tendency to swirl around in our brain even when we set it aside. When we engage with videos, images, articles, or online discussions, these interactions can continue to impact our thought life hours later – for better or for worse.

On the flip side, when we allow our thought lives to be primarily influenced by our daily reality and by the real needs and interests of those around us, we may find ourselves being more mentally aware and engaged.

I have personally found that instead of pondering some random comment or status update, I’ve been thinking more about people in my daily life and the situations they are facing. Cutting out extra online time was like cutting all the spam from my email inbox.

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4. More “Face Time” – The less time we spend attached to media, the more time we have to invest in face to face relationships with our neighbors, co-workers, and most importantly, God and our family. These “flesh and bone” people are the ones we should invest the best and bulk of our time with.

5. Greater Engagement in the Present – when you are connected to your phone, checking the latest game scores or facebook updates, you miss what is going on around you in real life.

Even simple things like putting my phone in my pocket while I am in the grocery checkout line and choosing to have a conversation with my cashier rather than texting shows to that individual that I notice them and I want to engage.

This fabulous commercial sums it up 🙂

So – am I coming back? Yes and No. And more no than yes. Yes, I am thankful for Facebook because it is a tool that has allowed me to connect with long distance friends and keep in touch. However, when I do come back, I plan to limit my exposure in order to make more thoughtful social media exchanges rather than mindlessly scrolling through status updates.

How about you? Could you use a respite from Facebook or another form of media? I can tell you from experience – if you take a “time out” you simply won’t regret it!

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So Others May Eat: A Rice and Beans Challenge

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In the beginning of January, our pastor invited our church to participate in a season of Asking with Fasting as a congregation. The church gave out a prayer calendar to each person which designated a different prayer focus for each day. As for fasting, he asked us to pray about how God might be calling us to participate personally.

When this invitation was made, my husband and I got very excited. We have fasted in the past and seen God move in powerful ways through those consecrated times and seasons.

A Fast for Others

Isaiah 58 outlines what God wants from us when we fast. As I read it, one section really stuck out to me in a new way:

“Is not this the fast that I choose: to loose the bonds of wickedness, to undo the straps of the yoke, to let the oppressed go free, and to break every yoke? Is it not to share your bread with the hungry and bring the homeless poor into your house; when you see the naked, to cover him, and not to hide yourself from your own flesh? Then shall your light break forth like the dawn, and your healing shall spring up speedily....” – Isaiah 58:6-8

As my husband and I prayed about what God wanted us to do in response to our pastor’s challenge, we both felt prompted to fast in different ways individually. But I wanted our family to do something together – something that even my children could participate in.

As I prayed, I felt prompted by the verse in Isaiah 58 that speaks of fasting in order to share your bread with the hungry. I decided that during a certain period of time, we would set aside a number of meals each week where we would just eat rice and beans. Then we would give what we saved in our grocery budget to feed the homeless in our area.

Why Rice and Beans?

Most of the world lives on an existence diet – just enough to get them through the day. In many of these countries, this diet consists of rice and beans (often only served once per day).

I want my kids to learn that this is the diet of much of the world. And that even as children, they can personally sacrifice in a small way so that others might eat.

But I wanted more for them – I wanted them not to just see Mom write a check to a homeless shelter, but to have the chance to connect intimately in giving to others what we all save together.

After praying and calling a few places, I found a shelter 10 minutes from our house that is for women and children only. They would love for our whole family to come, prepare a meal in their kitchen (with ingredients we would purchase from what we saved eating rice and beans) and then serve and eat with the women and children.

My children are so excited to join in this endeavor, knowing that they will be able to be a part of serving when it is over.

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Won’t You Join Us?

When we shared in our church small group how each of us has chosen to participate, a friend of mine sent me to this website of a church that did something very similar. Many people in this church ate rice and beans for a week and gave what they saved to those in need. It even lists some wonderful recipes to get you started!

If you would like to participate in a meaningful fast as an individual or as a family, consider joining us in this rice and beans challenge!

Small sacrifices from each of us can go a long way to ensuring that others may eat. I’d love to hear from you if you choose to join in!

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The Power of Forgiveness

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In January of 1956, the world was shocked at the news that five American missionaries in the Ecuadorian jungles had been speared to death by Aucan Indians – one of the most savage tribes in the world.

Elisabeth Elliot was the wife of Jim Elliot, one of the missionaries who had been killed. At the time of Jim’s death, she was left with a baby daughter, Valerie, to care for on her own.

Everyone would have understood if Elisabeth and her daughter retreated in fear and pain to the United States, never to return to Ecuador again. But that is not what they chose to do.

When Valerie was only three years old, Elisabeth and Rachel Saint (the sister of another one of the missionaries who had been killed) headed back into Auca territory to finish the mission that their husband and brother had begun.

They worked tirelessly to translate the Bible into the Aucan language, bringing the message of salvation to the tribe who had killed their loved ones.

In her book, “The Savage My Kinsman,” Elisabeth shares, “The fact that Jesus Christ died for all makes me interested in the salvation of all, but the fact that Jim loved and died for the Aucas intensifies my love for them.”

A Gospel of Forgiveness

When we hear stories like this, we are inspired that a regular person, weak and sinful like ourselves, could put aside hurt, fear, pain, anger and reach out in love to one who has wounded them so deeply.

But that is exactly what Christ did for us: “God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8).

Even on the Cross, as He suffered at the hands of those who nailed Him there, He prayed for them: “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do” Luke 23:34.

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Forgiveness is a Choice, Not a Feeling

Many of us have been wounded deeply by others. Perhaps we are waiting to forgive until time has passed – which we hope will somehow make us “ready” to forgive. We may be waiting for our hearts to heal and for our emotions to line up with the decision to forgive. We may simply be waiting until we aren’t so angry.

But we learn from Christ that forgiveness is first an act of the will, not the emotions: “Forgive one another just as God in Christ has forgiven you” (Ephesians 4:32). We can choose to extend forgiveness to others for this simple reason: Christ forgave us.

Forgiving is Not Condoning Sin

“To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you.”
― C.S. Lewis

When He calls us to forgive, Christ is not asking us to excuse someone’s sin or condone it. He is not telling us to say what happened to us wasn’t wrong. Our confession can acknowledge the reality of our pain as well as our choice to forgive: “What (this person) did to me was wrong. But I choose to forgive them because Christ has forgiven me.”

When we forgive a person, we release ourselves from the bitterness that poisons our hearts and we entrust that person to Christ, who is the Righteous Judge.

Forgiveness is a Witness to the World

Finally, when we choose to forgive by the grace and love of Christ, we testify to the world that love is stronger than death, forgiveness more powerful than hatred, and that a new story of redemption can be written over a painful past.

Who has injured you, friend? To whom do you still hold a grudge? Have you allowed bitterness to take hold of your heart, thinking that your unforgiveness is justified by the depth of the wrongs you have experienced?

Christ knows your pain and wants to heal you. He calls you higher – to forgive others as He has forgiven you.

Don’t wait until you feel ready. Choose to forgive now and let the healing begin.

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