Every year on my birthday, I ask God to speak to me a word that will be my motto or focus for that year. This year my birthday came at a time when I had just had a newborn (I am still in this fog, by the way) and eager for God to give me vision and direction for the year ahead (which I know may prove to be an intense one in many ways).

This is the Scripture that The Lord has graciously given to me for my 36th year of life and I wanted to share it with you today in hopes that it will help to provide you with new vision and purpose as well:

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” (Matthew 11:28-30 MSG)

Learning the Unforced Rhythms of Grace

This phrase, “learn the unforced rhythms of grace” began to marinate in my soul as I seemed to repeat it again and again over the next several days. I knew that this is what God is challenging me to learn and yet there is a mystery involved.

How does one learn these rhythms? I looked up the definition of “rhythm” in the dictionary and it was quite helpful in providing me with some insight. It is “a strong, regular, repeated pattern of movement or sound.”

My mind immediately leapt to my daughter and her violin practice every day. As she picks up her instrument and bow every day, she repeats the same movements, notes, sounds. They form together to become rhythms, tempos, songs. She learns to “ride the rhythm” of the songs the more that she repeats them, day after day, note after note.

She forgets these rhythms if she stops practicing. “Mom, can you play that song again? I can’t seem to remember the tune,” she may say.

Rhythms of Daily Life

God has called us each to play a specific piece, if you will, again and again in this season. Your piece will look different than mine, your rhythm may be faster or slower, louder or softer – but there will be a rhythm to what He has called you to do.

My task (and your task, too!) if I will choose to accept it is to discover the rhythm He beckons me to play and to play it well, again and again, each and every day.

Once I get into that rhythm of grace, that rhythm of rest, how will I know when I am moving away from it? Catch the word “unforced” in the passage above. When I try to force something to happen where there is no grace, no energy, no margin to achieve it, it is simply out of the rhythm of life God is calling me to in this season. When I try to carry heavy burdens to prove that I am capable, sufficient, or strong instead of bearing the “easy and light” yoke that comes from His sustaining presence and His irrevocable calling, I shift and buckle under the weight.

Those around me may bear the consequences as a result.

If you hear yourself saying how hard or unbearable life is, that may be a good indicator that you have stepped out of the “unforced rhythm” of God’s grace and picked up some burdens He isn’t calling you to bear. It may also be that you are trying to carry it all without His help and guidance.

The year ahead of us is sure to be a messy, challenging, beautiful one: full of love, tears, adventure, beauty and joy – if we choose to find a daily rhythm of life and carry a load that suits the back that God gave us.

One day we may carry more and one day we may carry less – but that matters not. What has God entrusted to you today? Are you reveling in it? Carrying it joyfully? Bearing it with grace? Let go of any excess baggage and enjoy your journey – starting NOW.

When you meet someone in Washington D.C. for the first time, it’s common for them to ask the question, “What do you do?” Folks in our area joke that life here can be like one big networking event, where folks are always trying to assess whether you have any strengths to bring to their table. Regardless of why this question is asked, I have learned to love answering it simply because I love what I do.

I have chosen to focus my time and energy at home with my children. On occasions that I am asked to elaborate on what that looks like, folks often respond, “How do you do all of that?!”

This may be because in addition to being a stay at home mom who home schools my eldest two daughters, cooks the meals, and keeps the house running, I also teach weekly childbirth classes, write on a regular basis, host guests regularly through AirBnB, and serve in a variety of ways in my community and church.

Most of the time, this does not overwhelm me. This is DEFINITELY NOT because I am a “supermom.” As I pondered how I have chosen to invest my time in this season, I wanted to share some wisdom I have gained along the way regarding time management:

1) Pray About Your Priorities – God has clearly called me to focus on my home in this season and to teach my children here. So that has been my first priority. As I consider any other opportunity that may come my way or may interest me, I bring it before The Lord (and my husband for his wisdom and counsel) before saying “yes” or making a longer-term commitment.

2) Live a Centralized and Integrated Life – Some people say “homeschooling must be so hard…I can’t imagine all the work and stress of being responsible for teaching your kids on your own.” Again, let me be really honest with you. There are definitely days and moments when teaching my children isn’t easy, but I have found that (for our family) the benefits and blessings far outweigh the challenges.

And when it comes to time being freed up, homeschooling actually allows my family to have flexibility in our schedule. We get our school work done in the morning (in addition to weekly chores, cleaning, and dinner prep-work, which we accomplish as a team) and have the afternoon to go on outings with friends, spend lots of time outside, and also have plenty of quiet time.

I write and have personal devotional time every day during our family “quiet time” and I teach childbirth classes out of our home one evening per week. Because most of what I do is centered around this one place, it makes it all manageable and organic.

Choosing a central location around which to prioritize the majority of your commitments can be incredibly useful in accomplishing your goals and making the most of your time.

For instance, it will likely be stressful if all your commitments are geographically far apart.

Living a centralized life will allow for more margin as your activities and commitments integrate themselves more naturally.

3) Learn to Say “No” More Often. While we all have to step up and help out in areas that may not be our favorite (i.e. mow the lawn, scrub the toilet) the majority of our time should be invested in people and activities that we love and enjoy and are, therefore, life-giving. It feels good to use the gifts and talents God has given you and be energized about how you have chosen to invest your time.

4) Create Healthy Boundaries – Learning to say “No,” to what will draw you away from where you are called to serve will create healthy boundaries and also help others to see that you have clarity and resolve behind your commitments.

5) Make Time for Your Health – Exercise. Eat Right. Make room for solitude and reflection. Prioritize family and life-giving relationships. These are non-negotiable if you are going to live a healthy and fulfilling life.

In summary, which of these areas can you focus on to bring more health to your life and schedule? Prayerful decision making? Centralizing your commitments? Learning to say “No”?, Creating Healthy Boundaries? Making Time for Your Health?

What else would you add to this list? What has helped you to find balance and focus? I would love to hear from you!

My dear Joseph David,

Six days ago you entered the world and stole my heart forever. How can a mother of three girls prepare for having a son?

Layers of pink dresses, ladybugs, craft projects and dolls adorn our home and rightly so. But we’ve fixed up your room with trucks and campfires, bears and fish and all things “Great Outdoors.”

You arrived on a Friday, just before the Shabbat sundown. As Jews around the world lit their candles and welcomed the rest of God, I embraced you and rested from a long but super speedy labor.

Let me explain. Thursday night the pains began. The waiting commenced. With fits and starts and putsing around, I chatted with midwives and walked my neighborhood with your Daddy, hoping you would make your appearance. Contractions started. Stopped. Started. Stopped.

I endured a night of restless sleep, awakened by contractions that then stopped again and again.

In the morning, my birth team left. I needed space to labor. I needed space to think. I took a nap and went on a long walk alone with God. I told Him that I was ready for you to come, but I felt peace and contentment in the moment, knowing that waiting was productive – waiting would bring me YOU – at the time YOU wanted to be born.

I came home and shortly after, you decided it was time. Labor went from a walk to a sprint and in two hours of intense contractions and three pushes, you were born – gliding gracefully into the water of my birthing tub and directly into my arms.

I scooped you up and brought you to my chest. Your sisters arrived just in time to see you pulled out of the water. “He’s here!” I said. “Joseph is here!”

Joseph David – what is in your name, my son? For seven years we have carried your name. For seven years we have known somehow that we wanted you – needed you in our family.

Joseph means “He will add.” God has added to our family a little boy. He has added a brother to your sisters. He has given your father and me a son. And I believe that the world has been given a great treasure.

We named you Joseph because we believe that you are called to be a man of godly integrity in a world of corruption and compromise. We believe that, just like your namesake in the Bible, you are going to be a dreamer and a doer.

And we promise to believe in the dreams that God gives you, even when, at times, we may not understand them.

As you prepared to enter the world, your Daddy read the words and admonitions of Proverbs over you. “My son, listen to my instruction, that the years of your life may be many….Fear The Lord and depart from evil…Let your heart hold fast to my words. Keep my commandments and live.”

We pray that, like your namesake, when you are faced with temptation, your response will be “How can I do this thing and sin against God?” He is jealous for your whole heart and I pray that your heart would be His alone.

You will likely be thrown into some pits in this lifetime. Sometimes people won’t like you. Sometimes you will be treated unfairly.

Be it pit or palace, I pray that your response would be trust in God and praise in His name. He has a glorious plan for your life, my son, and I wait with joy to see how that plan will unfold.

May your life come full circle so that one day you will look back upon it and say, even of the hard times, “What had been intended towards me for evil, God has used it for good.”

May the face of our God shine upon you. May you delight in the joy of His friendship and the shelter of His almighty arms.

May He preserve, protect, and defend you and may you cling to Him all the days of your life.

I look forward to watching you grow. I look forward to playing in the mud with you and learning what it looks like to mother a son – to mother you. I look forward to walking with you, cheering you on through life’s highs and the lows.

I love you forever and you will always be my beloved son, Joseph David Thomas.

With love,
Your Mommy